Hey man sorry I got all grabby
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize