a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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