Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
