3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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