did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize
