How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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