just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize