I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
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