she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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