Texts From Last Night

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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.

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  (479): i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for. http://tfl.nu/5iul
  Replies (22) Good night (3432) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant

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  (229): College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant http://tfl.nu/1flc
  Replies (67) Good night (5805) Bad night (1766)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch

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  (804): She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch http://tfl.nu/datu
  Replies (14) Good night (4373) Bad night (1264)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?

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  (330): Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch? http://tfl.nu/ae8u
  Replies (6) Good night (3276) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.

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  (832): My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking. http://tfl.nu/1gc1
  Replies (4) Good night (2183) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.

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  (704): Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch. http://tfl.nu/j8q7
  Replies (13) Good night (1552) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car

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  (586): somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car http://tfl.nu/ci3e
  Replies (6) Good night (985) Bad night (2217)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.

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  (302): Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom. http://tfl.nu/7x02
  Replies (9) Good night (3230) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.

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  (870): I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team. http://tfl.nu/hbuy
  Replies (6) Good night (2151) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong

  (813): View more from Florida

  Thats admirable.

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  (719): he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong (813): Thats admirable. http://tfl.nu/7e4g
  Replies (7) Good night (1492) Bad night (773)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.

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  (607): Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete. http://tfl.nu/hi8m
  Replies (3) Good night (1418) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right

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  (207): So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right http://tfl.nu/bi9y
  Replies (7) Good night (1476) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  We were destined to go to rehab together

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  (405): We were destined to go to rehab together http://tfl.nu/ewf5
  Replies (4) Good night (678) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?

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  (518): Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt? http://tfl.nu/4gjt
  Replies (4) Good night (316) Bad night (836)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won

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  (856): Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won http://tfl.nu/yv5v
  Replies (2) Good night (965) Bad night (323)

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