I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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