if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
