Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
We are all done wearing pants today
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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