You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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