We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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