I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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