no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
