Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
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