yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
