Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
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