i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
