Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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