i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
