Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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