don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
