idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Randomize
