Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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