Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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