Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize