I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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