...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
