"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
