but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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