the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
