i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
