Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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