what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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