oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Randomize
