Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
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She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
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We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
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