If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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