I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
