am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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