I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
