I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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