Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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