She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
i need some magic done to my vagina
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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