so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize