Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize