It's like God shit irony all over that family
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
