3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize