I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
tequila makes me forget i have legs
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Randomize
